20 Things You Can Do In the Morning That Don't Involve Torturing Non-Morning People

My famous writing career doesn't make me enough money to buy lunch.

So I answer phones. I answer phones for all kinds of businesses and I have the graveyard shift.

One moment I'm talking to someone who has just lost their spouse so they're calling the funeral home. The next call will be someone in a panic because their dog is dying and they need a vet. I'll get calls from people who've had trees go through their roof or their basements are flooding, or they've locked themselves out of their house. Sometimes it's on the AA line and they need to talk to someone but I can't find someone for them to talk to so I end up talking to them because they need to talk to someone. I get calls from elderly people who don't realize it's 3 in the morning and they wonder where their home-care worker is. I call out alarms. I call doctors. And occasionally I get a person who just wants to yell at someone so they pick me.

What amazes me are the people who are shocked that businesses don't open at 6 am. We're not talking emergency calls here. We're talking people who want to speak to someone specific, pay bills, set up appointments, or complain.

News flash - Businesses don't open at 6am. So for you 6 am morning people who are twiddling your thumbs and wondering what you can do with your mornings (note - this is obviously not a mother with kids at home) - instead of saying "I know, I'll call up businesses and complain about stuff and yell at people..." I give you several other options that will probably set up your day better.

1. Drink a glass of water, have a cup of tea, grab a mug of coffee. No matter what it is, it's a good start. Or you can go with orange juice, or if it won't bother anyone, make up a smoothie. Maybe if you hydrate yourself you won't feel so wrinkly.

2. Meditate. You don't have to be able to cross your legs. You don't have to chant OHM. This is not some weird devil magic. If you have trouble focusing and imagining nothing, there are great guided meditations on the internet. I like The Honest Guys (although I don't like their name - it makes them seem dishonest). They take you on fantasy meditations where you can visit hobbits, meet unicorns, or just sit by the ocean. Or you can find something more traditional - like floating around on top of clouds. You can chant OHM but it isn't a requirement. Breathing is.

3. Pray. You can team this with meditation if you wish or do it on it's own. Even if you don't believe in a higher power you can use this time to formulate the things you are thankful for and voice the things you need or desire. Say your gratitude out loud. Say your desires out loud. You're alone. No one is judging you.

4. Read something inspirational. Whether it be spiritual, or something that inspires you to achieve your dreams or even something that makes you laugh or cry. It could be inspirational non-fiction, or a Chicken Soup book, or your scriptures, or Calvin and Hobbes...whatever you feel inspired by. Personally I find Calvin's morbid snowmen very inspiring.

5. Exercise. Now's a great time to get that workout in. You can go to the gym (they are open early in the morning), go for a walk or run, do aerobics or dance, practice yoga, lift weights, stretch, or even have a meet up date with a friend for a racket or basketball game. Now, if you live in an apartment, then you might want to avoid jumping up and down. You don't want to end up in the downstairs neighbors bed with him and his wife.

6. Shower and get dressed. Unless you're having a pajama stay in the house all day, this is a really good start. Especially if you've exercised and you're going to be around people. Do everyone a favor. Besides, nobody wants to see you in a bunny onesie with the seat open.

7. Skin care routine. This includes your hair and teeth. Don't forget to moisturize and put on sunscreen if you need it. I bet people who call up people to scream at them, haven't got the gunk out of the corners of their eyes yet.

8. Make and have breakfast. Enjoy it. Like really savor it. If you're alone you can read or watch the news at this time. Go outside with it. Pretend you're at a cafe in Paris, or in a cabin in the woods. It's hard to be mad when you have good coffee and a cheese omelette with a side of bacon.

9. Write. You can journal or do morning pages (this is where you write stream of thought for 3 pages), or work on that book you never have time for, blog, or just jot down the things you're grateful for. You don't have to be a writer to do this. Anybody can do this - well, I guess you have to be literate, but beyond that - it just requires a pen and paper, or your computer.

10. Plan your day. Get out your calendar or planner and figure out your day or your week. You could also plan your menu at this time. Look at you all organized and knowing what appointments you have and what tasks you need to do. It's nice to have it down on paper or your phone so you don't have to put it in your brain where it gets lost as if it's in that warehouse in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

11. Housework. Empty the dishwasher, run a load of clothes, sweep the floor, make your bed, tidy up from last night. You don't have to do a deep clean, just do something that makes a difference so that it doesn't look like you could be on a hoarders show.

12. Gardening. Early morning is a nice time to spend in the garden. Do quiet things like weeding, planting, or gathering produce and herbs for meals. You can even read out there. Or eat breakfast, or do yoga. Or build a treehouse - okay, that's too noisy for early morning, but you can decorate a tree house. Do not mow the lawn. Mowing the lawn is reserved for annoying neighbors on Saturdays and Sundays.

13. Social media. Want to connect with people? Don't call them. Go on social media. You can set a timer. Check your facebook, check your emails, check your twitter, check whatever else is out there. Go on rants, start fights - whatever makes you happy.

14. Catch up on the news. WARNING - this will not de-stress you. But it might rev you up. And you'll have something to talk about at the water cooler. Then you can go on social media and complain about the latest thing the idiot did. (I am not naming names).

15. Prep your dinner meal. Maybe you can crock pot today. Or cut up veggies, or thaw out some meat. Or make sure that there's ice cream in the freezer and make a note that you do have dinner ready.

16. Hobbies. Take some time for your favorite hobby as long as it's a quiet one. Revving your motorbike is not it. Nor is starting up the chain saw to do your log sculptures. But if you like to sew or knit, play video games, do puzzles, build models, paint pictures, now is a great time to get that non-stress time in before you have to do the stress time.

17. Take care of your mail and paperwork that's piling up. Pay bills online or by check. Sign permission slips. Study that lawsuit. Write out birthday and thank you cards. Or even write an old fashioned letter.

18. Call a friend or family member who you KNOW is up AND you KNOW they are social people in the morning who like to talk. DO NOT CALL ANYONE ELSE. People will not like you. Businesses are closed. You will lose friends. Your house will get egged. Be careful.

19. Cleanup and organize the files on your computer. The thousands of emails, the unused downloads, the copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of a ...

20. Feed the cat. Or the dog. Or the plant. Or the fish. Whatever needs to be fed. This prevents them from dying. *****

Today's Canadian Woman is...

Nellie McClung (1873 - 1951)